The End? Or The Beginning?

Wow, it is so crazy how quickly this year has come and gone. I remember when I had first decided to start this blog. This was always a way for me to release everything I was holding in, every anxiety, every failure,  and major successes.  I do believe I have given a bit of everything from me and my writing.  In looking back at this year,  my addiction has definitely been a major factor in my emotional  sporadicness.  I’ve relapsed, cleaned up, ect,  and sometimes it feels  like a revolving door,  now don’t get me wrong, I will be the first  person to admit we are the reason of the revolving door. Everyday we make choices,  good and bad.  Free will?  Isn’t that what they call it lol.It still baffles me how we allow ourselves to become victims to our  addiction.   I’ve come to terms with the fact that I am an addict,  and I know that this will be a battle I will probably be facing for the rest of my life.  I do have strength,  and with that I will fight to not allow my  addiction to destroy me.  Am I where I wanna be,  Hell no, not even  close to,  but I’m not at the bottom,  which definitely makes the journey a lil easier.  So to end this year,  I am definitely looking to close some  chapters in my life that have been a long time coming.  Hoping to close how self destructive we can be to ourselves.  And hoping once and for all put an end to my addiction and the power it has over me.

 

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